Chicago Boyz

                 
 
 
 

Recommended Photo Store
What Are Chicago Boyz Readers Reading? Click here to find out.
 
Make your Amazon purchases though this banner to support our blog:
(Click here if you don't see the Amazon banner.)
 
  •   Problem? Question?
  •   Contact Contributors:

  • CB Twitter Feed
  • Lex's Tweets
  • Jonathan's Tweets
  • Blog Posts (RSS 2.0)
  • Blog Posts (Atom 0.3)
  • Incoming Links
  • Recent Comments

    • Loading...
  • Authors

  • Notable Discussions

  • Recent Posts

  • Blogroll

  • Categories

  • Archives

  • Archive for the 'Humor' Category

    25 Stories About Work – The Unfortunate Incident In the Base Housing Area

    Posted by Sgt. Mom on 11th May 2015 (All posts by )

    (A retelling from my extensive archives of a certain unfortunate incident, and the efforts involved in keeping a straight face when broadcasting about it on the local radio station.)

    As it so happens with so many unfortunate incidents, it came out without much warning, and piece by piece, the first harbinger being in the form of an emergency spot announcement brought around from the front office by our admin NCO. The radio and television station at Zaragoza AB was situated in two (later three) ancient Quonset huts. The radio and engineering sections occupied the largest, which was two of them run together at some long-ago date. (We were never able to get permission to run all three buildings together with an extension— the cost of building such would be more than the real estate value of the three buildings being combined, and so, of course, it couldn’t be done. My heartfelt plea to build extensions to the existing buildings which would take them within six inches or so of the other structures and let us fill in the gap with a self-help project was routinely and cruelly rejected. Base Civil Engineering can be so f**king heartless.)

    Sgt. Herrera found the radio staff in the record library: a small, windowless room almost entirely filled with tall shelves roughed out of plywood, and filled with 12-inch record discs in heavy white or manila shucks. A GSA metal utility office desk, and a couple of library card-file cabinets filled up the rest of the available space, which was adorned with outrageous and improbable news stories clipped from the finest and most unreliable tabloids, Far Side cartoons, and current hit charts from Billboard and Radio & Record. The morning guy was putting away the records that he had pulled for his show, the news guy was using the typewriter, and I was supervising it all, and prepping my playlist for the midday show.

    “The SPs want this on the air right away.” He handed the slip of paper to me. “The dogs are real dangerous.”
    Read the rest of this entry »

    Posted in 25 Stories About Work, Humor, Miscellaneous | 5 Comments »

    25 Stories About Work – TV Knights & Radio Daze

    Posted by Sgt. Mom on 11th April 2015 (All posts by )

    The guys at Far East Network-Misawa in the days of my first duty station in the Air Force and my first overseas tour were a joke-loving lot, much given to razzing each other, with elaborate practical jokes and humor of the blacker sort. Practically none of it would survive scrutiny these days by a Social Actions officer, or anyone from the politically-correct set, either in the military or out. The nature of the job means the successful are verbally aggressive, intellectually quick, and even when off-mike, very, very entertaining. Some broadcasters I encountered later on were either sociopaths, terminally immature, pathological liars, or otherwise severely maladapted to the real world. They could generally cope, given a nice padded studio, a clearly defined set of duties, and a microphone with which to engage with the real world at a remove. Regular, face to face interaction with others of their species was a bit more problematic. But all that would come later. The people during my first tour or two were something else entirely.
    Read the rest of this entry »

    Posted in 25 Stories About Work, Humor, Military Affairs | 7 Comments »

    Spotted at the Starving Artists Art Show …

    Posted by Sgt. Mom on 4th April 2015 (All posts by )

    in San Antonio’s La Villita this afternoon. What beverage ought to be drunk in celebration from these goblets, and by whom?
    Read the rest of this entry »

    Posted in Americas, Conservatism, Humor, Latin America, Photos | 6 Comments »

    Mainstreaming Anti-Israel Prejudice…and Anti-Semitic Stereotypes?..among the “Casual Left”

    Posted by David Foster on 2nd April 2015 (All posts by )

    The replacement for Jon Stewart on “The Daily Show” is named Trevor Noah. His Twitter stream has revealed some…interesting…”jokes,” like this one:

    South Africans know how to recycle like Israel knows how to be peaceful.

    Apparently, the Israel-is-an-aggressor meme has oozed its way into the popular consciousness to the degree that Israel is stereotypically non-peaceful in the way that dogs stereotypically dislike cats.  I expect this sort of thing will go over quite well with the audience (generally left-leaning, I feel sure) of The Daily Show.  They will also probably like this one:

    When flying over the middle of America the turbulence is so bad. It’s like all the ignorance is rising through the air.

    …although perhaps this won’t go over as well coming from a non-American (Noah is South African) as it would coming from a suitably hipsterish American.

    Read the rest of this entry »

    Posted in Europe, Germany, Humor, Israel, Judaism, USA | 10 Comments »

    Eddie Izzard: Star Wars Canteen

    Posted by Jonathan on 17th March 2015 (All posts by )

    Posted in Humor, Video | Comments Off on Eddie Izzard: Star Wars Canteen

    St. Patrick’s Day and Journalism

    Posted by Carl from Chicago on 17th March 2015 (All posts by )

    I’m going to combine two posts here that don’t sound like they’d go well together – “Day Drinking” and lazy journalism. There was an article by Stanley Bing (the pseudonym of an executive who writes for Fortune magazine) who happens to 1) be an actual business executive 2) writes effectively (and hilariously). While I can’t find the exact post I am paraphrasing below:

    Whenever I see anything written about my company in the popular press, it is generally incorrect. Thus I must conclude that most of what I see written about other companies in the press isn’t right, either.

    Business Insider is a great resource that I read on my iPhone most days when I have a few minutes to kill. They have some original content and re-post from other sources. Recently I read about the “five biggest” St. Patricks’ day celebrations (parties) which was a typical “puff piece” article for them – you can see it here.

    The only problem with this article is… that it is lazy and wrong. Our own correspondent Dan happened to be on the ground in Las Vegas for St. Patrick’s day last year and he said it was “Chicago on an inter-galactic scale” which I believe since Dan has been at a ton of drinking events through being a sports fan forever. I am having trouble verifying this on the ol’ intertubes but it is the kind of event where “hey, the Chicago River is green, we can trot this story out every year, there we are done” but the massive scale of Las Vegas means that if you have a drinking event they can just pour out of the hotels and onto the streets (that they shut down) and go crazy and drink outdoors. Probably the only way to officially verify this is to send Art Mann out to Las Vegas as the ultimate decider…

    Onto Chicago for St. Patrick’s day… we had a beautiful day and so everyone was out in force. People were lining up per usual in the wee hours (many bars open at 6am) for a long day of drinking here in River North.

    I loved this outfit… a drunk gumby up at Paris Club!

    Read the rest of this entry »

    Posted in Chicagoania, Humor | 7 Comments »

    Our Need For Categorization

    Posted by Carl from Chicago on 14th February 2015 (All posts by )

    I am an enormous fan of “top lists” and almost any sort of categorization. If it is the top 100 guitarists, the greatest bands, a type of warship, or anything else – I like to see it in a category and classification that can explain trends and try to cut through complexity by organizing the data into different groupings.

    Sirius XM radio stations are a great example of categorizations. Recently on a trip with Dan and our friend Brian we had the station stuck on “Hair Nation” – and then we started thinking through the different stations and how Sirius has chosen to allocate music across each of them.

    Some bands are solidly “Hair Nation” – Poison, Warrant, LA Guns, and everything else with spiky hair and all about having a good time. While Dan is more “Hair Nation” – I am more on the “Boneyard” station, which has a big overlap with Hair Nation but a whole host of songs that aren’t on Hair Nation, such as UFO and older heavy metal like Judas Priest.

    We started to have a mock “debate” in a snooty English style of “Dear Sir – I beg to differ with your classification of the band Skid Row. “Monkey Business” is more of a hard Boneyard song while their ballads of course could reside properly within the confines of Hair Nation.”
    Read the rest of this entry »

    Posted in Humor, Music | 4 Comments »

    When Instapundit Earns a Face Palm…

    Posted by Trent Telenko on 9th February 2015 (All posts by )

    And he earns them for this post:

    BOLOS YES, TERMINATORS NO: We Can Now Build Autonomous Killing Machines. And That’s a Very, Very Bad Idea.
    Posted at 4:10 pm by Glenn Reynolds

    Silicon Valley, and the Techie crowd in general, have a hard time with any history that hasn’t happened in their own lifetime. But the Wired article Instapundit linked too is beyond the pale. Only a Silicon Valley Journalist serving a Silicon Valley cultural audience can say something as historically ignorant as this —

    “…You see, we’re already at the dawn of the age of killer robots. And we’re completely unprepared for them.
    .
    It’s early days still. Korea’s Dodam systems, for example, builds an autonomous robotic turret called the Super aEgis II. It uses thermal cameras and laser range finders to identify and attack targets up to 3 kilometers away. And the US is reportedly experimenting with autonomous missile systems.”

    …with a straight face in the earnest pursuit of eyeballs.

    Sadly, Instapundit fell for WIRED writer Robert McMillan’s repetition of Silicon Valley hype about Autonomous Killing Machines. and sent Wired an undeserved “Insta-lanch” instead of the “Fisking” it so richly deserved for this piece of historically ignorant/arrogant Silicon Valley Marketing fluff. (Admittedly the killer robot cartoon was retro-cute).

    The militaries of the world have quite literally built billions upon billions of Autonomous Killing Machines. for hundreds of years, at least since 1780, and in several different varieties. The first and most numerous of Autonomous Killing Machines are called _LAND MINES_.

    Cue in Gen Norman Schwarzkopf circa 1991 Gulf War —

    Read the rest of this entry »

    Posted in Civil Society, History, Humor, Military Affairs, Video | 7 Comments »

    Feminists – Doing It Wrong

    Posted by Sgt. Mom on 18th November 2014 (All posts by )

    I have to say this about the sh*tstorm over what is being irreverently termed shirtgate – it’s the final and ultimate straw in moving me away from ever calling myself a feminist again … at least, not in mixed company. Ah, well – a pity that the term has been so debased in the last few decades. Much as the memory of very real repression and denial of rights in the persons-of-color/African-American/Black community has been diminished, overlaid, generally abused and waved like a bloody shirt by cynical operators (to the detriment of the real-life community of color/African-American/Black-whatever they wish to be called this decade), so has the very real struggle for substantive legal, economic, economic and social rights for women also been debased and trivialized. Just as the current so-called champions of civil rights seem to use the concept as an all-purpose cover for deflecting any useful discussion of the impact of welfare, the trivialization of marriage, and glorification of the thug-life-style in the persons-of-color/African-American/Black community, the professional and very loud capital F-feminists seem to prefer a theatrical gesture over any substantial discussion of the real needs and concerns – and even the careers of ordinary women. Women whom it must be said, are usually capable, confident, tough, and love the men in their lives – fathers, brothers, husbands and sons.
    Read the rest of this entry »

    Posted in Civil Liberties, Crime and Punishment, Current Events, Diversions, Feminism, Human Behavior, Just Unbelievable, Personal Finance, Society, Space, Tech, That's NOT Funny | 66 Comments »

    Famous Quotations (Updated)

    Posted by Jonathan on 1st November 2014 (All posts by )

    autocomplete

    Posted in Quotations, That's NOT Funny | 1 Comment »

    Proof Positive

    Posted by Sgt. Mom on 25th October 2014 (All posts by )

    Below the fold, pictorial proof that everything IS bigger in Texas…

    Read the rest of this entry »

    Posted in Business, Customer Service, Humor, Photos | 12 Comments »

    In Keeping With the Chicagoboyz Color Theme of the Week

    Posted by Sgt. Mom on 11th October 2014 (All posts by )

    …of bright orange!

    The mighty pumpkin army is on the march.

    Posted in Humor, Photos | 2 Comments »

    Seriously Funny

    Posted by David Foster on 28th September 2014 (All posts by )

    Cold Spring Shops reminds us of the political value of mockery, linking Instapundit and Sarah Hoyt, and cites, as a classic example of the effective use of mockery as a propaganda weapon. the 1943 Donald Duck film Der Fuehrer’s Face.

    For your Sunday evening enjoyment and enlightenment, here it is.

    Posted in Advertising, Film, History, Humor, Media | 3 Comments »

    New! – Talk Like A Pirate Day XXXIX

    Posted by Jonathan on 19th September 2014 (All posts by )


    The new face of 4GW.

     
    Yes, it’s Talk Like a Pirate Day again.
     
    In response to severe military cutbacks, Jim the Pirate has been hired to police our southern border and, as resources allow, the entire Middle East.

    We are hoping that his health is up to the task as he has recently been seen working off the coast of Liberia and looks a bit wan in this photo.
     
     
    —-
    Previous Talk Like a Pirate posts:
    2011
    2007
    2006
    2005
    2004
    Introducing Jim the Pirate
     

    Posted in Humor | 8 Comments »

    Chicagoboyz Present…

    Posted by Jonathan on 17th September 2014 (All posts by )

    Un juego muy bueno:

    Posted in That's NOT Funny, Video | 6 Comments »

    The Best of Times

    Posted by David Foster on 31st August 2014 (All posts by )

    Claire Berlinski  asserts that:

    In rare moments in history, ordinary men and women have been uncommonly contented. By contented I mean precisely what those men and women meant: This is not my judgment of them; it is their judgment of themselves, reflected in their letters and their arts. They were contented with their social and political lives. They found their daily activities pleasurable. They considered themselves remarkably  fortunate to be alive at that very moment, in that very place. They were sunny in disposition, at peace with themselves, and above all, optimistic.

    She identifies six historical situations, ranging from Rome in 160-220 AD to the United States in 1952-1963, in which she believes this condition existed, and analyzes the factors involved.

    Ricochet (which is where Claire’s post appears) is a membership site; comments may be read by all but comments may only be added by members.

    Posted in Civil Society, Europe, History, Humor, Middle East, USA | 28 Comments »

    For Great Justice

    Posted by Jonathan on 25th July 2014 (All posts by )

    gettin ziggy wit it

    Chicagoboyz take off every ‘ZIG’.

    Posted in Humor, Photos | Comments Off on For Great Justice

    Bon Appetit

    Posted by Dan from Madison on 15th July 2014 (All posts by )

    I love a lot of things about France, and the food is probably one of the things I love the most. The French, at most restaurants that aren’t fast food joints, take their time eating and put all that they can into making their meals taste great and look great. Even when I dined at lower end establishments, they did whatever they could with what they had to make some sort of artistry on the plate. They just appreciate it more than having meat, veggie and potatoes all separate with a hunk of parsley as plate filler like we do in the states.

    I am not saying that once in a while I don’t like a great steakhouse and/or ‘Mercun style meal. I do. I am saying that I prefer to take more time, relax and enjoy the artistry of a meal.

    One thing I really hate about restaurants in France (at least in the south of France where I have cycled the last four years) is that they all let dogs in. Bars too. At first I thought it was novel and cute, but that wore off rather quickly. Most of the time I see the dogs under tables. This scene above from a few weeks ago made my skin crawl.

    Cross posted at LITGM.

    Posted in France, That's NOT Funny | 17 Comments »

    Vatican Awkward?

    Posted by TM Lutas on 14th July 2014 (All posts by )

    Germany beat Argentina in the world cup finals
    The next meeting of Pope Benedict XVI and Pope Francis should be interesting.

    Posted in Humor | 1 Comment »

    Posted by Jonathan on 11th July 2014 (All posts by )

    floater

    Chicagoboyz put the water in watermelon or perhaps the other way around.

    Posted in Photos, That's NOT Funny | 2 Comments »

    For the 4th – Sgt. Mom’s Most Memorable

    Posted by Sgt. Mom on 4th July 2014 (All posts by )

    (From my archives – my most memorable 4th of July ever!)

    The flags are out, like it’s 4th of July every day, like the pictures I saw of the glorious, Bicentennial 4th of 1976… which I actually sort of missed. Not the date itself, just all the hoopla. The 200th anniversary of our nation, celebrations up the wazoo, and I missed every one of them because I spent the summer in England, doing that cheap-student-charter-BritRail-Pass-Youth-Hostel thing. I lived at home and worked parttime, and finished at Cal State Northridge with a BA and enough money left over to spend the summer traveling. I didn’t go alone, either. My brother JP and my sister Pippy were bored with the prospect of another summer in Tujunga, California. I assume our parents thought the world in 1976 was a much safer place than now, or I was responsible enough at 22 to be at large in a foreign country in charge of a 20 and a 16 year old.
    Read the rest of this entry »

    Posted in Anglosphere, History, Humor, Miscellaneous, Personal Narrative | 9 Comments »

    Holy Cow!

    Posted by Jonathan on 1st July 2014 (All posts by )

    The crack Chicagoboyz all-blogger precision drill and synchronized swimming team heads to the beach to hone its skills.. . . .

    Posted in Humor, Video | Comments Off on Holy Cow!

    Posted by Jonathan on 19th June 2014 (All posts by )

    canned gold

    After Janet Yellen’s latest press conference Chicagoboyz plunge heavily in canned kipper snacks and other hard assets.

    Posted in Photos, Public Finance, That's NOT Funny | 6 Comments »

    New! – Your Florida Driving Tips

    Posted by Jonathan on 10th May 2014 (All posts by )

    -Drive slow in the fast lane? Yes, you can!

    -If you maintain a speed of at least 120 MPH while weaving through highway traffic on your motorcycle, other vehicles will appear to be standing still, making it easier for you to maneuver around them.

    -Hills are rare. Savor them. Slow down to 15 under the limit on any bridge or elevated express lane. The drivers behind you won’t mind as they will now be able to enjoy the view themselves.

    Read the rest of this entry »

    Posted in Humor | 20 Comments »

    New! – Your Brave New World Haikus

    Posted by Jonathan on 2nd May 2014 (All posts by )

    Local elections
    Lots of bad referenda
    Of course they all pass

    —-

    Ammo at Walmart
    Queueing up, three box limit
    Things were better once

    —-

    NSA listens
    Who the hell knows what they’ve got
    We’re all wondering

    —-

    Your student loan debt
    Makes you unmarriageable
    Might as well be gay

    Posted in Poetry, That's NOT Funny | 6 Comments »