Many years ago, before the charity course kicked into high gear, I asked my friend Kathryn if I intimidated her. After all, I was a guy who had a lot of guns, I went to the range frequently, and I was always thinking about self defense options. This put a lot of people off, but not her. Why?
“Don’t be silly!” she said, laughing at my idiocy. “You are a protector!”
That is the best compliment I have ever received.
This op-ed discusses how a male in Great Britain cannot stop to talk to a child in public without facing arrest. London Mayor Boris Johnson claims that this is due to the “pedophile plague”.
So the incidence of pedophilia in the UK is so great that it is considered a scourge on society? I can’t seem to find any statistics concerning this, and even the author of the op-ed uses US statistics on page 2 of her article to make a point. But, if it isn’t a problem, then why would a male who is seen to be conversing with an unattended child be snatched up by the police and bundled down to the precinct house for some hard questions? Maybe it is a case of public perception run amok, seeing monsters where few actually exist.
One thing is for sure. The threat of arrest, of having my good reputation smeared by suspicion even if no criminal charges are ever brought before a court, would cause even me to pause before helping a child in distress. And that means actual stranger pedophiles, those who snatch children from public areas, are given an open field. The greatest protection a child could have in those circumstances, that a passer by would intervene, is much reduced.
What the hell is going on over there in the UK?
(Hat tip to Glenn. I cross posted this at Hell in a Handbasket because the readers over there are more involved in self defense and crime prevention.)
I commented on your Handbasket blog to link to this programme which performed an excellent satire of the bizarre attitudes concerning paedophilia.
One thing I forgot to mention over there is that as the law stands someone who is convicted of armed robbery and murder is in a better position than someone convicted of the most minor sexual offence as the latter will be placed upon the sex offenders’ register from which there is no escape even when one’s conviction is spent.
“What the hell is going on…” is example number 812,579 of the pernicious results of what I have dubbed the “Seat-Warmer Theory”, conceived in the blink of an eye when my brother some years ago proudly showed off the seat warmers in his new Beamer.
Namely, our markets AND our politics, and thus our entire culture, is driven utterly, relentlessly, and unremittingly toward driving every, single solitary possible smidgen of an iota of real or perceived “discomfort” from any aspect of our lives. (“Discomfort” = “Bad Stuff”) If it is something bad, be it pedophelia (monstrous) or a cold-tushy (please), it does not matter, the media and culture will scream that we must be protected from it, the politician will leap forward to save us from it, and/or the markets will roll in to tell us that you won’t suffer from it if you buy our product or service, and, maybe worst of all, the lawyer will rise up to tell you that if said “bad thing” does brush against you in even the slightest way, someone else can be blamed and forced to give you money for it, with a nice chunk going to the savior of society lawyer along the way of course.
End result is a civilization of people every bit as pampered and helpless as your average first grader was 50 years ago, and about equally capable of dealing with life’s rougher edges. (Recent event: California court rules a woman who pulled a another woman out of car in danger of blowing up is liable for injuries suffered during the rescue. Rescuer was uttely unrelated to and innocent of fault in the wreck, caused by the victims car, but rescuer now must fight for her assets in court, etc.)
The tiny minority of adult males who would prey on children is not to be ignored by any stretch, (and may or may not be a bigger problem because of the Internet), but the sacrifices we make across the board in fear of problems, or the remote possibility of potential problems, can be both subtle and immensely damaging, and the virtual separation of adult males from children in any and all ways is an excellent example.
In other words, bad stuff has happened. Bad stuff is happening. Bad stuff will always happen, until you die. Be smart, realistic, and judicious. In other words, be a grown-up.
And God save us from our benefactors.
This reminds me of a very sad conversation I had with my niece last spring when she graduated from high school and I flew in to be there. I’d always encouraged her in her academics and pursuits (she was a nationally-ranked Irish Dancer, the expenses largely funded by me–her mother is not making much).
A few days later she invited me out to lunch, which turned out to be a picnic lunch at a park she liked to go with her friends. She told me she appreciated all I had done for her and that I had always been supportive and encouraging, but…why did I never take her places when she was a kid? Why did I always shake her hand when we met instead of a hug?
I had to explain that when a young girl is a cute as she was (seriously, model-quality looks) it is simply not possible for a single male to be alone with her or physical with her in any way. She had been deeply saddened by the situation and she said she bitterly regrets it, as we got along so well. She joked it was pretty pathetic that some of the best times we’d had were when I was at the kitchen table helping her with her math and physics homework. But after I spent some time explaining it, she reluctantly understood, although she was furious at the system that “robbed her of a relationship with her only uncle.”
And I regretted it, too. She’s a wonderful kid, always has been. Psychopathic fear over the possibility of an event that occurs once in 1000 times at most, denies the proper adult friendships and healthy physical contacts necessary for proper mental and emotional development for the other 999. Anyone think that isolation might have damaging effects as well? No wonder modern kids, raised in a cocoon, are often lacking in common sense. If the world around you as you grow up has been designed to be all but risk-free, when you wander out on your own one can expect disaster…and we get it.
And as has been pointed out many times, a lone kid, lost or whatever, is not a lone male’s problem any more. Maybe if they were in clear and imminent danger of immediate physical harm…but I’d want to make sure there were witnesses. Dial 911? No way. They’ll trace it to your phone.
And I was told to move away from a playground in a park. I was waiting for my wife to finish playing with our dog in the nearby field, and had moved to a bench closer to the playground just to get out of the wind. A cop was called by one of the mothers and informed me that if none of the kids were mine, I was require by law to stay 75 feet away.
To yank a minor from a airplane seat next to an adult male is insulting and discriminatory in the extreme. I’d have my lawyer on their ass. After all, 30% to 40% of all molesters are women (google it).
A generation of kids are growing up with no father in the house, and carefully isolated from any real male role models. Where do they find them instead? MTV. Rap. Movies. Ideal male role models for your kids, don’t you think?
But hey! We’ve saved them from a 1/1000 chance of meeting the kiddy-diddlers and their “bad touch.”
sad uncle, I have to say I find your story somewhat bizarre. I have always gotten lots of hugs from my uncles and went out to do things with them, despite being (then) an attractive young woman, and I never knew anyone to think anything about it at all. an uncle who greeted me with a handshake rather than a hug in my home for fear of looking like a pervert (in front of his sister?) would be a very strange person.
AndrewX: I would go a step further. I suspect that it’s not only the “Seat Warmer” thing you’re describing (also recently discussed at Belmont Club) that’s to blame for all this, but rather the interaction between that and the usual PC/pacifist mentality that forbids society and its members from confronting real evil by any means necessary. If real pedophiles, and other types of criminals, ran a significant risk of a violent death (be it at the hands of protective parents or other adults, or of professional law enforcement) every time they did their thing, the rest of us wouldn’t have to worry about random strangers interacting with kids in public. After all, under such conditions only a complete idiot would try to kidnap a child in public in broad daylight. But no, we can’t have any of that, because (1) doing so would supposedly bring society down to the pedophiles’ level, and (2) pedophiles have human rights too. See also Britain’s unwillingness to take on sea piracy, for more or less the same PC/pacifist reasons.
I wonder if pedo stuff is on the rise due to these new attitudes, or if we just hear more about pedophilism (is that a word?) now because of more and contant media attention. I think in the fifties, if a guy approached a kid and “made an offer” or abused a kid that the chances would be MUCH greater of them getting the living crap kicked out of them by the neighborhood dads than it would be now. Joshua hit on this theme as well.
In Britain, the solution is simple. The one way for a pedophile to not get arrested, and be given a free pass to practice, is to simply claim to be a Muslim.
In that case, the British authorities will not arrest him.
This is scary. What if an innocent 3-year-old just runs over and grabs your leg? You did not approach the child. But this does happen with some children who are just very friendly.
OMG. I hadn’t even thought of that..
I suspect that the media attention has quite a lot to do with it, hence the link I posted above. Many of the general public would be quite happy to treat paedophiles to mob justice given half a chance and tabloid newspapers are happy to whip up this hysteria. They have even assisted in this by releasing the names and addresses of people on the sex offenders’ register.
This definitely a problem. There was a case, (IRRC) in Britain, last year or so in which a toddler wandered away in a park and drowned in a pool. An adult male had seen the toddler heading unaccompanied towards the direction of the pool but did not stop the child out of fear he would be accused of being a pervert.
I think the real cause of this hysteria is that we brought pedeophilla out into the open in last twenty years. In the past, authorities handled such cases very quietly for fear of stigmatizing the children. The media likewise kept information about such crimes low key. When the stigma of being a victim disappeared the field was wide open for sensationalism. For a time in the 80’s it seemed like every case, real and imagined, was trumpeted nation wide creating the impression of a wide spread and common phenomenon.
The vilification of males by capital-F feminist didn’t help either. Neither did the internet which has enough child porn on it that people can stumble across it accidentally. That creates the impression that there must be a large number of consumers for such material.
There may be more sexual abuse of children today than in the past because the changes in family structure put children in more intimate contact with men who are not biologically related to them. However, I think the stranger danger phenomenon is just pure hysteria.
“There may be more sexual abuse of children today than in the past because the changes in family structure put children in more intimate contact with men who are not biologically related to them. However, I think the stranger danger phenomenon is just pure hysteria.”
Actually, the majority of sexual abuse comes from biologically related family members.
James
James R. Rummel,
Actually, the majority of sexual abuse comes from biologically related family members.
Not from my readings. Children are statistically most likely to be sexually abused by a non-biological male intimate. The most common culprit is mom’s boyfriend. You have to drill down in most statistics because most sources don’t pay attention to biological relationships, its not PC.
It’s like murder. Only 2% of familial murders occur between blood relatives.
I think this stuff just shows the continued bias against men that is pushed by the lefty feminists..
They speak out of both sides of their mouth… bashing men for not participating enough in child rearing but at the same time bashing any man who takes even a momentary interest in a child (for the entertainment and growth of the child by interacting with adults or even for the elementary interest in the protection of a child in distress). We are taught that men are not interested in children, and that the ones who are willing are predators out to molest them. It is a truly lose-lose-lose situation, and the bigest loss is for the children who do not get to have respectible male role models in their life.
# belle waring Says:
sad uncle, I have to say I find your story somewhat bizarre. I have always gotten lots of hugs from my uncles and went out to do things with them, despite being (then) an attractive young woman, and I never knew anyone to think anything about it at all. an uncle who greeted me with a handshake rather than a hug in my home for fear of looking like a pervert (in front of his sister?) would be a very strange person.
Gee, Belle, must be nice to be a woman who doesn’t have to worry about such things. And the time period involved was a era where there was unusual hysteria over this sort of thing. But thanks for making my decisions for me and telling me what I should have done. I’m sure you would have been there to bail me out and pay for my lawyer.
> The dialing code on that notice is 01, which is the pre-1990 code for London and it should therefore no longer work. It’s strange that they haven’t bothered to update it.
LOL. I was walking through Penn Station in NYC, headed for JFK. I was following signs that said “This way to the JFK express”. They just led to nowhere. I asked around, no one could tell me anything. Finally I met someone who’d been there a long time. “Oh, yeah, those are for a connecting tunnel that was removed 7 or 8 years ago.”. That was in 1986. The signs are probably still there…
Government workers will only “fix” problems if they are expressly told to do so. And they’ll NEVER report problems on their own or encourage anyone to actually make a decision which involves telling them to do so. That would add to their already massive workloads….
:-/
OOP. Wrong thread. Sorry.
In THIS thread’s vein, though:
Australian Judge finds ‘Simpsons’ sex cartoon to be child porn.
Welcome to the New World Order.