Jay Manifold

Riffing on U.S. to unveil new citizenship questions — and, just maybe, James McCormick’s phenomenal review immediately below — here’s some ideas:

1. What portion of US GDP is taken by government, at all levels, each year?

(Acceptable answer: at least 30% or $3.3 trillion.)

2. What portion of law enforcement resources in the US is devoted to nonviolent narcotics offenders, versus violent offenders of all types?

(Acceptable answer: they are approximately equal, as a percentage of arrests.)

3. What is the proposed penalty in Federal law for scientists engaging in somatic-cell nuclear transfer (SCNT)?

(Acceptable answer: ten years in prison and a $1 million fine [Human Cloning Prohibition Act].)

4. Sen Ted Stevens (R-AK) described the internet as “a series of …”?

(Acceptable answer: anything with the word “tubes.” Extra points for speculating how long the nation can survive with technologically illiterate leadership.)

5. How much money has been spent on welfare since the inception of the Great Society programs?

(Acceptable answer: at least $18 trillion in 2006 dollars. This figure includes all transfer payments carried out at the Federal level, but none by state and local governments.)

6. Still sure you want to go through with this?

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