Lese-Majeste

(Sorry, no history post today – just too much going on and I am too steamed about this particular First Amendment issue. It seems that in the eyes of certain parties, our current president may not be mocked by the peasants.)

That useful concept (thank you, the French language for putting it so succinctly!) is defined “as an offense that violates the dignity of a ruler” or “an attack on any custom, institution, belief, etc., held sacred or revered by numbers of people.”Well, it appears that our very dear current occupant of the White House is certainly held sacred by a substantial percentage of our fellow citizens. How else to account for the perfectly earsplitting howling from Missouri Democrats and the usual suspects over a rodeo clown wearing an Obama mask to yuck it up before the crowd most of whom seem to be laughing their heads off. All but the desperately sensitive, who breathlessly insisted that it was just like a KKK rally, practically. The rodeo clown’s name apparently is Tuffy Gessling; his supporters, and those who, as a matter of fact, support the rights of a free citizen to mock authority figures of every color and persuasion, have set up a Facebook page. He’s also been invited by a Texas congressman to come and perform the skit at a rodeo in Texas.

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New! – Your Midweek Apropos of Nothing Haikus

Stupid green features
Mindlessly pause computer
Just when you need it

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Had a profound thought
But forgot to write it down
Now it’s gone, dammit

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They’re modern women
And yet they still expect you
To pick up the check

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Feeling like a cork
Cast adrift on life’s ocean
Age does that to you

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It’s an absurd world
Your hovercraft full of eels
My dog with no nose

Lois Lane Tries Computer Dating, in 1961

Saw this comic book cover displayed at the Computer History Museum last summer:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

…had to search around the Internet to find the story. It seems that a friend, knowing that Lois will never get anywhere with Superman, tricks her into appearing on a TV program in which the UNIVAC computer is used to find ideal matches for people. When she is called on stage, Lois agrees only because she thinks it might make a good story for the newspaper.

How does it turn out? You can read the whole story here.

You will be gamed

It is dangerous to promote an ideal and pretend it’s not for entertainment purposes only.

From time to time, motivational slogans like “national interest” and “grand strategy” have proved useful in prodding the slothful along. Fiction has power to move people and move people it does. Mixing up myth for reality, however, leads to cognitive whiplash when reality steps, as it must, on myth. Many gleaming ideals are little more than bright colors painted on after the fact to cover up grimy back stage shenanigans and less than visionary ad hoc improvisations, usually for temporary short-term political gain.

Entering politics, if you lead with your idealistic chin, you will soon discover you have a glass jaw. As Warren Buffet might have said once, “If you’ve been playing poker for half an hour and you still don’t know who the patsy is, you’re the patsy.” This is true even in organizations that are reputedly non-political. Experience suggests that, the more someone protests how non-political they are, the more political they prove to be.  Consider three of the most consequential peace treaties of the twentieth century:

Key West Agreement”  (Function of the Armed Forces and the Joint Chiefs of Staff)

Signed: April 21, 1948

Belligerents: United States Army, United States Navy, United States Air Force

Results:

  • ‘The Navy would be allowed to retain its own combat air arm “…to conduct air operations as necessary for the accomplishment of objectives in a naval campaign…”‘
  • “The Army would be allowed to retain aviation assets for reconnaissance and medical evacuation purposes.”
  • “The Air Force would have control of all strategic air assets, and most tactical and logistic functions as well.”

Pace-Finletter Memorandum of Understanding

Signed: November 4, 1952

Belligerents:  United States Army, United States Air Force

Results:

  • “removed the weight restrictions on helicopters that the U.S. Army could use”
  • “widened the range of tasks the Army’s helicopters could be used for”
  • “created an arbitrary 5,000 pounds weight restriction that limits the Army’s ability to fly fixed-wing aircraft”
  • “the U.S. Army…is dependent upon the U.S. Air Force to purchase and man fixed-wing ground-attack aircraft to fulfill close air support missions”

Johnson-McConnell agreement

Signed: April 6, 1966

Belligerents:  United States Army, United States Air Force

Results:

  • “the U.S. Army agreed to give up its fixed-wing tactical airlift aircraft”
  • “the U.S. Air Force relinquished its claim to most forms of rotary wing aircraft”
These are examples of what Paul Wolfowitz said about the use of “weapons of mass destruction” as the primary justification for the Iraq intervention:

“The truth is that for reasons that have a lot to do with the U.S. government bureaucracy, we settled on the one issue that everyone could agree on which was weapons of mass destruction as the core reason,” Wolfowitz was quoted as saying in a Pentagon transcript of an interview with Vanity Fair.
 
The magazine’s reporter did not tape the telephone interview and provided a slightly different version of the quote in the article: “For bureaucratic reasons we settled on one issue, weapons of mass destruction, because it was the one reason everyone could agree on.”

America’s armed forces are, and always have been, dens filled with vipers scrambling for procurement bucks. For every John Boyd willing to subsist on morning dew and lichen gnawed from the bottom of rocks for principle, there are fifty James Wilkinsons with eyes single to the glory of their personal bottom line.

Some of this is due to unideal incentives to let slip the inner sociopath when someone, previously constrained by circumstance of the most bootlicking sort, acquires power. A professor of H.W. Brands  used to observe “a country gets the foreign policy it can afford”. This is why, since political power is a form of supply that generates its own demand, today’s U.S. has a finger in every global pie. Similarly, a problem at a lower rank can become a catastrophe when promoted to higher rank. More power comes with more opportunities for pratfalls: an officer gets the Paula Broadwell he can afford.

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