Poetry

New! – Your Unusually Banal Friday Haikus

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I had all these plans
A brief nap and suddenly
It’s three hours later

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Good flying advice:
Break ground, take off into wind
And not the converse

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At the gas station
We cringe at the dreaded words:
See clerk for receipt

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Fix-A-Flat didn’t
Our Costco tire warranty
Came to the rescue

—-

Feel free to add your contributions in the comments.

A Christmas-appropriate Poem from Rudyard Kipling

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(may not seem like a Christmas-appropriate post based on the first 2 stanzas, but read on…)

“Gold is for the mistress — silver for the maid —
Copper for the craftsman cunning at his trade.”
“Good!” said the Baron, sitting in his hall,
“But Iron — Cold Iron — is master of them all.”

So he made rebellion ‘gainst the King his liege,
Camped before his citadel and summoned it to siege.
“Nay!” said the cannoneer on the castle wall,
“But Iron — Cold Iron — shall be master of you all!”

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New! – Your Chicagoboyz Annual Labor Day Haiku Sale

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Time to say the words
That all women yearn to hear:
Make me a sandwich

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Wasted three-fifty
On crummy Chinese loofa
Caveat emptor

—-

New taste sensation!
Herring poached in Mountain Dew
Hey, where you going?

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Learned something today
Schools don’t teach cursive writing
Man do I feel old

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My dog has no nose
Where have we heard this before?
Conspiracy talk

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Waiting-room TV
Like Harrison Bergeron
Can’t think for the noise

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The dreaded message:
“Windows can’t stop your device”
Time to pull the plug

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(Feel free to add your contributions in the comments.)

New! – Your Bi-Monthly Haiku of the Day

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Cramer’s hot stock pick
Getting blasted this morning
Fools and their money

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The Prius driver
Accelerating slowly
Watching mileage gauge

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Amazon Prime trial
Expires in a couple days
Must buy lots of stuff

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Internet hygiene:
Pruning the Israel haters
From your Twitter feed
 
 
 
 
 
 
(Feel free to make your own contribution in the comments.)